Dear Nandini
I am naturally a very anxious person, and I know I will be a wreck on the day of the Wedding. My mom thinks she is the force of calmness, but will probably make things worse. What can I do to make the day go smoothly?
Dear Anxious Bride-to-be
The big day is approaching, and amidst the excitement, joy, and endless to-do lists, a familiar feeling creeps in: anxiety. If you’re a bride-to-be who finds herself worrying about being anxious on her wedding day, you are absolutely not alone. This is an incredibly common and completely understandable emotion. After all, your wedding day is a monumental event, filled with high expectations, intense emotions, and a whole lot of attention. But here’s the good news: while you might not be able to eliminate every single flutter, you can absolutely manage your wedding day anxiety and ensure that your special day is filled with cherished memories, not dread. This guide is here to offer practical advice, reassuring words, and actionable steps to help you walk down the aisle feeling calmer, confident, and present.
It is OK to be Anxious
First and foremost, permit yourself to feel what you’re feeling. It’s okay to be anxious! Trying to suppress these emotions can often make them stronger. Instead, acknowledge them. Say to yourself, “It’s normal to feel a bit overwhelmed right now. This is a big day, and it’s okay to be nervous.” This simple act of validation can be incredibly effective in diffusing some of the intensity.
Second, identify your triggers. What specifically is making you anxious? Is it the thought of being the center of attention? The pressure to have everything perfect? The logistics of the day? Family dynamics? Public speaking (even if it’s just saying “I do”)? Pinpointing the root causes of your anxiety can help you address them more directly.
Third, Plan for Calm. Use some common Pre-Wedding Strategies
- Delegate, Delegate, Delegate: You cannot do it all. Period. Hire a wedding planner if your budget allows, or enlist trusted friends and family members to help with tasks. Create a detailed timeline and assign responsibilities to others well in advance. On the day itself, your only job should be to get married.
- Practice Self-Care: In the weeks leading up to the wedding, prioritize self-care. This isn’t selfish; it’s essential. Ensure you’re getting enough sleep, eating nourishing foods, and moving your body. Consider gentle activities like yoga, meditation, or simply taking a warm bath.
- Schedule Downtime: Amidst all the appointments and celebrations, deliberately schedule periods of quiet time for yourself. A walk in nature, an hour with a good book,some time to simply sit and watch a movie or even just a few moments of silence can help you recharge.
- Rehearse What You Can. While you can’t rehearse your emotions, you can rehearse the mechanics of the day. A wedding rehearsal is crucial for this. Knowing the flow, where to stand, and what to do can significantly reduce anxiety about the unknown.
Cultivating Serenity The Morning Of
The morning of your wedding can be a whirlwind of activity and emotion. Here’s how to create a peaceful start:
- Create a Sanctuary: Designate a calm, quiet space for yourself where you can get ready. Minimize distractions and excessive noise.
- Stick to Your Routine as much as possible: If you typically start your day with coffee and a quiet moment, try to incorporate that. Familiar routines can be grounding.
- Eat a Nourishing Breakfast: Even if you don’t feel like it, try to eat something substantial. Low blood sugar can exacerbate anxiety.
- Surround Yourself with Your Calmest People: Choose your bridesmaids and key support people wisely. You want individuals who will uplift you, keep you laughing, and help you stay calm, not add to the stress. (Maybe give your mom an ‘important role’ that would keep her busy…;)
- Have a “No Surprises” Rule for Your Hair and Makeup: Do multiple trials for your hair and makeup well in advance. This ensures you love your look and avoids any last-minute panic.
During the Ceremony and Reception
Staying Present and Focus on Your Partner. When the nerves kick in, especially as you walk down the aisle, shift your focus to your partner. Their smiling face is a powerful anchor. Remind yourself that this day is about the two of you.
Practice Mindful Breathing: Take slow, deep breaths. Inhale slowly through your nose, hold for a few seconds, and exhale slowly through your mouth. This simple technique can immediately calm your nervous system.
**Have a “Happy Place” Thought.** This is a key superpower that can carry you through your day. If you feel overwhelmed, mentally transport yourself to a serene place or recall a cherished memory. This can provide a brief, calming escape.
Embrace Imperfection. Something will probably go wrong. The band might play the wrong song, a button might pop, or someone might spill a drink. Laugh it off. These little “imperfections” often become the most memorable and charming parts of the day.
Allow Yourself to Feel Joy. Don’t let anxiety steal your joy. When you feel a wave of happiness, lean into it. Savour the moments, the laughter, the love.
Remember that experiencing anxiety doesn’t diminish the magic of your wedding. Being anxious simply means that this is something of importance to you. It means you’re human, deeply invested, and ready to embark on a beautiful new chapter. Your wedding day is a celebration of love, commitment, and the exciting journey ahead. While anxiety might try to sneak into the guest list, you have the power to manage it and ensure that joy, peace, and unforgettable moments are the true stars of your show.
Your Wedding Expert,
xoxo Nandini for TastersHUB Catering and Events
“If I had a flower for every time I thought of you… I could walk through my garden forever.” — Alfred Tennyson
